The Secret Poisson Society

This is an experience from high school:

I had the same math teacher in 9th and 11th grades. He was very silly and entertaining but not very good at explaining math concepts to me. So near the end of 11th grade he was giving us surprise tests almost every day. I don’t know why I was always surprised since they happened so often.

To vent my frustrations, I would write, in pencil, in the score space, little notes like, “You’re mean” or whatever. Then I’d erase the notes before handing in my test. But one day, to my horror, I forgot to erase a note that said, “I hate you.” I got my test back. He had added the note, “Dork!” at the top in red marker.

Soon after, I wrote a note that said, “Il y a un poisson dans vuetre biblioteque.” This is the only phrase I know in French. (I may not remember it correctly now; it was a long time ago.) It means, “There is a fish in your library.” So I’m doing classwork after the test while the teacher is grading them. In the silence he calls out, “What’s a poisson?” It takes a lot of effort not to laugh or cry or give myself away. He gets the two Asian students sitting nearby to translate the sentence. (It takes him a while.) Even in English, it doesn’t make sense to him. I continue to leave strange notes on my tests during the school year.

At the end of the school year, I have him sign my yearbook. He signed everybody’s yearbook over a picture of himself beating his rival, my chemistry teacher, in an arm wrestling contest. In mine he wrote, “I try not to hurt people, just like all members of the secret poisson society.”